The Signal: News for Santa Clarita Valley, California

"We tend to be politically correct in the West and it's impolite to point out that there is hardly a spot on the globe where Islam is not at war with not only its neighbors, but itself, as well."

"According to the Reuters news agency: "At least 1,413 people - referred to as 'amateur butchers' by the Turkish media - were treated at hospitals across the country, most suffering cuts to their hands and legs, the Anatolia news agency reported."

"You wonder if some South Seas villager or later-day Conan the Barbarian, hovering over a steaming carcass, was ever visited by introspection:

"Hmmm. I keep doing this, over and over - slitting the throats of Bossy the Cow or Vicky the Virgin. Has my life been demonstrably better?"

The number - 1,413. People with broken toes, cracked ribs from being squished by a bull, inflamed and swollen groin from being butted by a goat, self-inflicted stab wounds, heart attacks and concussions.

Well.

Less than 1,413, factoring in the dead folk.

They're probably sitting in the waiting room, asking one of two soul-searching questions:

"Am I praying funny?"

Or -

With a steely eyed gaze aimed at a distant horizon: "That didn't work. Next year, I'm going to need a bigger animal..."

The Signal: News for Santa Clarita Valley, California